Implication Simplification

What people continue to fail to understand about me is that I am an idiot. I think this perpetuates because people tend to assume I have the book smarts. This may or may not be true; several pieces of paper attest to that truism, but were I truly book smart, the only one of those papers I would have would be the B.A. from UMCP. No, I am an idiot when it comes to the street smarts. What people also assume is that since I can analyze textual interplay, I should be able to read between the lines when it comes to people. No, not even close.

Case in point: I received a text from Z.M. while playing the poker. We were going to hang out with the NCI swing shifters, and she told me she would have no problem if I drove to her place first so we could drive down to "Old Town" together, also making the requisite designated driver comment. I read this as her making a concession for me, and didn't want to impose, so I said it was OK, I'd find my way down on my own.

You cannot float ideas to me, because they will float right over my head. This was her way of saying "Hey, I want to drink. I know you're not. Please drive me?" and of course, that whooshing sound was me not getting it at all. This, of course, came out later when I finally arrived, only forty-five minutes late (stupid, stupid, stupid!). Z.M. casually (causally?) mentioned that she'd found a ride down, but didn't have a ride back.

I look over, my face screwed up. Something along the lines of:

K.T.: Why didn't you ask me for a ride?
Z.M.: I did.
K.T.: No, you didn't.
Z.M.: What did you think that text was?
K.T.: I'm an idiot! You have to ask me directly!

Note the wild gesticulations as I stumbled across the cobbles of Old Town (Gotham? No! Alexandria!), and the borderline screaming. I am the epitome of calm and composed.