Pawned Away

With all the time I spent in Baltimore, you'd think I'd have gone into one of their many fine pawn shop establishments, and you'd be wrong. When R.Y. asked me if I wanted to go one, I said "Sure."

As I'm just now really lazy, I'm just going to list the observations I made.

Twelve chainsaws. I wanted to buy one, but R.Y. forbade it, stating it would be a bad idea, and I would need both arms for later. For once, he was the sensible one.

Several pay phones and pay phone stands were available for sale. R.Y. had to mention to me that a lot of the stuff was probably stolen. This was driven home when I saw over forty graphing calculators in the glass cabinet.

Lots and lots of lawn mowers and other related equipment. I really wanted to buy one, though I have no lawn of my own. Looked in my wallet, and realized that since they are a cash-only establishment, I'd not be able to afford much of anything.

There were a lot of game systems and games. The temptation to get a Gamecube for Smash Brothers...

A lot of items were available on an installment basis, but why you would need a silver set so badly you would pay $4 a month for ten months is beyond me.

They also sold loose stones. One of the diamonds was going for $2,000. I would've loved to seen the person that had to sell that off.

R.Y. was looking for a subwoofer. He took a screwdriver to it to examine the insides, and several shards of broken glass fell out. How many innocent windshields must be sacrificed in order to bring the sub to the store? Still had a serial number, though.

While he was attempting to buy the sub, a wide Hispanic man, shorter than me, his fingers like vienna sausages, kept trying to sell R.y. his sub. He had a strange habit of always shoving his hands under his armpits right after finishing a sentence, like Mary Katherine Gallagher. However, he was shaped like a fleshy pear, and so his hands would barely cross over his chest. I sort of wonder what he smelled like.

Lot of guitars, probably because they're easy to move.

The prices would drop every three months, so if you could wait out something long enough, it would often be available for less than a pittance (a pity?).

At one point, "Hey There Delilah" started playing, about half an hour after one of the sales associates tested a subwoofer by playing a compact disc by rapper Angel Eyez.

Both of us wanted the paintball guns. Neither of us would have used them for good.